[ King Ploobis clutches his throbbing head. ]

Ploobis

Ohhh... ahhh!

[ Scred enters. ]

Scred

How's the migraine, your crotchetiness?

Ploobis

It's no better than the last time you asked, Scred!  [ POW! ]

Scred

[ nose squashed in ]  Hmm... well, you haven't lose your sense of humor, I see.

Ploobis

Ooorrgg... Why can't somebody get rid of this headache, Scred?

Scred

Oh, but sire, everyone has assembled, your irritance, each with his own cure for your royal headache!

Ploobis

Oh, well, just get on with it.

Scred

Your lovely wife Peuta believes she can soothe your throbbing head with a song.

[ Queen Peuta enters. ]

Ploobis

Good grief. You're going to sing?

Peuta

Yes. Are you ready, dear?

Ploobis

No. Just a minute here. [ He pulls a dirty rag out of a crater, and holds it to his head. ]

Peuta

MAESTRO! S'il vous plait. 

[ A pianist plays, and Peuta shrieks an operatic aria. Ploobis growls and stuffs the rag into Peuta's mouth. Furious, she runs off sputtering. Scred enters. ]

Scred

Wonderful, wonderful. Moving right along...

Ploobis

What's next?

Scred

To ease your monarchly migraine, here's the lovely, the charming, the sensational, the delightful -- our own dancing sensation, the lovely Vazh!

[ Vazh enters. ]

Vazh

Oh, Ploobis...

Ploobis

What?

Vazh

I have been working on a little dance that I hope will make your headache go away. And I hope you will feel better real soon.

Ploobis

[ sighs ]  Okay...

Vazh

Hit it, boys!

[ Belly dancing music starts, and Vazh gyrates suggestively, sticking her stuff in Ploobis' face. ]

Ploobis

Oh, wait, wait, hold it, hold it! Cut, cut! 

[ The music stops. ]

Ploobis

Not tonight, Vazh... I've got a headache.

Vazh

Oh, shucks.

Ploobis

Okay. Scred?

Vazh

Well, if that's the way you feel about it... Hmmph!

[ Vazh flounces off. ]

Ploobis

Why can't anyone come up with a cure? I've got morons on my team!

Scred

Well, look what I just found -- it's a do it yourself acupuncture book, and it has the needles and everything!

Ploobis

Rrrrrgggg... I'll try anything, Scred.

Scred

Okay, let's see. I have to find migraine... uh... Milady's Malaise, Marquesas Malady -- here it is, migraine! Ohhh! It says here that migraine headaches are extremely painful!

Ploobis

I know! I know!  [ POW! ]

Scred

Huh. Let's see. Okay. Take a needle -- right there, right there -- take any needle at all...

Ploobis

Huh. Take a needle? 

[ Ploobis picks up a long, sharp needle. ]

Scred

Yeah. Now, let's see. The first needle should be placed in the upper snout...

[ Ploobis looks warily at the needle. ]

Scred

Yes, thrust it into the nose with a firm, steady pressure.

Ploobis

... You do what?

Scred

Yes. Look, says right here. Thrust it --

S & P

[ together: ] -- into the nose with a firm, steady pressure.

Ploobis

Well, if it says so in the book, I guess... um... 

[ Ploobis shoves the needle into his snout. He stiffens with pain. ]

Scred

Ohhhh! How does that feel? It looks great!

Ploobis

It hurts like hell!

Scred

Uh... moving right along. Second needle, take the second needle, sire...

Ploobis

Take the what?

Scred

Second needle... second needle goes... let's see, it's placed in the lower lip, just above the dermal carapace. That looks like in the picture, yeah.

Ploobis

Right there?

Scred

Mmmm hmmm.

[ Ploobis sticks the second needle into his lip. He shudders and screams. ]

Ploobis

RRRRAAAAHHHRRGGG!

Scred

Oh. Ah. Let's see. Moving right along.

Ploobis

Scred... Scred...

Scred

Okay, okay. The third needle -- place the third needle... uh... in the upper lip. Let's see, uh, I guess that must be somewhere above the lower lip...

[ Ploobis thrusts the third needle into his upper lip, and screams again. He's stiff with agony. ]

Ploobis

RRRRHHHHRRRRRGGGG!

Scred

Okay! Moving right along. Here is the fourth and last needle. Okay. The fourth and last needle should be placed at the base of the brain.

Ploobis

HHRRNNNHH?

Scred

... If you can find it.

Ploobis

HHHRRNNN!

Scred

No, no, no, I just mean, sometimes when you're working by yourself, it's difficult to see. Yeah. Let's see.

[ Ploobis positions the fourth needle at his temple. ]

Scred

Yeah, that looks like in the book. Okay. Now, the fourth -- that's good. The fourth and final needle should be placed with extreme caution, using a smooth, easy, flowing movement -- like THIS! 

[ Scred WHACKS Ploobis' hand, and the needle shoots into Ploobis' brain. Ploobis writhes in agony. ]

Ploobis

RRRRNNNNNRRRHHHH...

Scred

How does that feel?

[ Groaning, Ploobis grabs Scred by the neck and starts to throttle him. ]

Scred

... you feel we should seek somebody else's advice?

Ploobis

RRRRHHHHHH!

Scred

Maybe your wife Peuta's advice.

Ploobis

NNNNNNRRRRHHH!

Scred

No no no! Uh... maybe Vazh's advice!

Ploobis

NNNNNNNNNNRRRRHHHH!

Scred

Uhhhh... the great god Favog!

[ Ploobis lets go. ]

Scred

Oh, thank god.

Ploobis

RRRRHHH! RRRRRHHHHH!

Scred

I'll guide ya. Okay, this way, this way... [ Scred leads Ploobis by the elbow. ] Look out for the big crater there... okay. Don't step in the gray stuff...

[ GONNNNGGG! ]

Favog

DIS IS THE MIGHTY FAVOG.

Ploobis

RRHHHHHNNNHH! 

[ Ploobis gestures at Scred. ]

Scred

Okay, okay. I'll tell 'im, boss. The Chief has a problem!

Favog

UHHHH... NOT TONIGHT. I GOTTA HEADACHE.

[ The camera pans back... and reveals a set of needles sticking out of The Mighty Favog. ]