[ King Ploobis is guzzling wine straight from the bottle. ]

Ploobis

Urrgh. I'm retired and I wanna go to bed... 

[ Queen Peuta enters, wearing a hairnet, shrieking as always. ]

Peuta

PLOOBIS!

Ploobis

Uhhh... I just changed my mind on that.

Peuta

COME to BED!

Ploobis

Don't tell me what ta do!

Peuta

You're still DRUNK!

Ploobis

And you're still ugly! We're even. Hah. 

[ Peuta stalks off. ]

Ploobis

We're even. Ha hah.

[ Scred enters. ]

Scred

Shoop shoop -- ah, hiya, chief! I got the ice and the beer nuts, but they're all outta lampshades.

Ploobis

Lissen, Scred, have a drink -- I hate ta drink alone, Scred.

Scred

Awww, no, no, I'm seein' double already!

Ploobis

Well then, both of you have a drink! 

[ Ploobis grabs Scred, twists his head up and pours from the bottle down Scred's neck. ]

Scred

Waagghh!

Ploobis

There ya go. That's drinkin' like a man, Scred. Drunk like a man.

Scred

Ahhh, you forget what planet you're on. That's drinking like a snerch! Hee he hee.

Ploobis

Oh, yeah, I forget how much those snerches drink. Yes indeed.

Scred

Hey, ya know, you should --

[ Ploobis notices that Scred's arm is still hooked around the wine bottle. ]

Ploobis

Hey, yer caught on me there, Scred! Leggo of me!

Scred

I don't want it... [ They manage to disentangle themselves. ] Yeah, you shouldn't drink, though. Yeah! You should just lay offa that stuff!

Ploobis

Awright. [ He points at the bottle. ] You're FIRED! Ya get that, I laid off the stuff, ya see that? Ah ha hah! Oh, yes indeed.

Scred

Oh, yeah, sure. Hm.

Ploobis

Yeah, Scred?

Scred

Hmm?

Ploobis

Scred?

Scred

Yeah?

Ploobis

Ya know why I drink?

Scred

No.

Ploobis

It's because I hate myself.

Scred

Ohhh! That explains why I drink! I hate you too!

Ploobis

Scred! [ POW! ]

Scred

Actually, I'm only kidding. You're my very favorite!

Ploobis

Rruhhr?

Scred

Yeah. I just love bloated green things.

Ploobis

Scred! I like you too, see, Scred. I like the way your neck and my hand are a perfect fit. [ He grabs Scred's neck and squeezes. ] Rrrmmrrrahhhrrr!

Scred

Glug -- how convenient!

Ploobis

Nrrr. Wait a minute, Scred. Wait a minute.

Scred

What?

Ploobis

Why don't, why don't, why don't, listen. Why don't, why don't, why don't we go see The Mighty Favog.

Scred

Aw, no! I gotta better idea!

Ploobis

What's that?

Scred

Why don't we go see The Mighty Favog?

Ploobis

That's a good idea! Let's do that, c'mon, let's go. Oop, it's not that way, it's the other way. Here we go.

Scred

Show me the way to go home...

[ GONNNGG! The Mighty Favog is revealed. ]

Favog

DIS IS THE MIGHTY FAVOG.

Ploobis

That is The Mighty Favog!

Scred

Yeah, it sure is! Hee hee hee. Hey, Mighty Favog! Me and my little dog Toto here wanna go back to Kansas!

Ploobis

Har har har! Woof woof! Ha hah.

Favog

... YOU GUYS BEEN HITTIN' THE SAUCE AGAIN.

Scred

Aw, we just had a coupla drinks!

Ploobis

Yeah, yeah, lighten it up there, stone face!

Scred

Stone face! Oh, yeah, he's got a face that would stop a clock!

Favog

STONE FACE? THOU SHALT NOT TAKE THE FACE OF THE LORD THY GOD IN VAIN!

[ KEE-RASH! There's a clap of lightning and thunder. Ploobis and Scred quiver in fear. ]

Favog

HEH. THE MIGHTY OZ HAS SPOKEN.

[ Favog nods, satisfied. ]