(Peppy fairytale music plays as Snow White skips up to the dwarves' cottage, humming a happy tune.)

Snow W

La la la-la, la la la-la, laaa laaa laaaaaa...

(She knocks on the door.)

Pokey

Yeah, come in! The door's open!

Snow W

He-llooooo!

Pokey

Yeah?

Snow W

I bet you know who I am!

Pokey

Can't say as I do, lady.

Snow W

Oh. Well. I'll give you a hint. You are all dwarves, right? 

Pinky

Yeah, so what?

Snow W

Well, I'm Snow White!

Drippy

Hmmm?

Pokey

Well, that's, uh, that's terrific, baby, I'm pleased ta meet ya! What can we do for ya?

Snow W

Oh. Well. Now, I'm not sure I'm in the right place. How many dwarves are there here? 

Schnooky

How many, that's a good question! Let's see, there's, uh, there's Pokey...

Pokey

Yeah, there's Pokey.

Schnooky

And there's Sparky.

Sparky

Eh.

Schnooky

And, uh...

Pokey

Flaky.

Schnooky

Flaky, yeah, and then there's, uh, Sneaky, and Pokey...

Pokey

No, you named Pokey, you already named me already.

Schnooky

Oh, I did.

Pokey

Yeah.

Sparky

Hey, we gotta do somethin' else. Let's count off. Let's get in a big circle.

Pokey

Oh, okay, all right. Get in a circle, we'll count off.

Sparky

Now, when we count off, jump up, so we'll know.

Pokey

Okay. 

Sparky

I'll start. One!

Schnooky

Two.

Pokey

Three.

Flaky

Four!

Drippy

Five.

Sneaky

Six!  (They go around the circle, and keep going.)

Sparky

Seven!

Schnooky

Eight! 

Pokey

Nine.

Flaky

Ten.

Drippy

Eleven.

Sneaky

Twelve...

Snow W

Now, wait a minute...

Sparky

Thirteen!

Schnooky

Fourteen.

Snow W

Uh, dwarves... 

Pokey

Fifteen. 

Flaky

Sixteen!

Snow W

Oh, just a moment... oh, hush now...

Pokey

Oh, wait, wait a second.

Sparky

I got counted twice.

Snow W

Now, just a moment, listen...

Pokey

I got counted a couple of times, too.

Sparky

That's okay, it's good for ya!

Snow W

Let's all settle down. 

Flaky

I got counted three times. 

Snow W

If you all talk, you can't hear me-ee! So let's all settle down.

Snow W

This is no good. When you count something, you're supposed to count everything one time only. Now, let's all line up, and I'll count you. Let's go.

Pokey

Yeah! Good idea. Line up, everybody. Okay.

Snow W

Line up! That's right. You get there, and you there.

Snow W

All right, now. Here we go. And who's this?

Sparky

Uh... I'm Sparky.

Snow W

Sparky, you will be number one. 

Sparky

Number one.

Snow W

Yes. Who's this right here?

Schnooky

I'm Schnooky.

Snow W

All right, Schnooky, you'll be number two.

Schnooky

Number two.

Snow W

Who's your little friend here? 

Pokey

Little friend? I'm Pokey, lady.

Snow W

All right, Pokey, you'll be number three. And who's with you, Pokey?

Flaky

I'm Flaky.

Snow W

Flaky, I'm sorry to hear that, you'll be number four.

Flaky

All right.

Snow W

And who's this little sweetheart here?

Drippy

I'm Drippy.

Snow W

Drippy, you'll be number five.

Drippy

Mmmm. 

Snow W

And little dear, what's your name?

Sneaky

I'm Sneaky.

Snow W

Sneaky? You'll be number six.

Snow W

And... (She turns to the next dwarf, but there isn't one.) ... uh... Where's the other one?

Sparky

There's not any other one. We're only six of us.

Snow W

But, uh... isn't this the cottage of the seven dwarves?

Pokey

No, no, no, this is the cottage of the six dwarves! You want the cottage of the seven dwarves, that's on down the street. You go down about three doors and turn left at the post office. 

Snow W

Oh. I'm terribly sorry. 

(Snow White exits, humming to more peppy music.)

Snow W

La la la-la, la la la-la, laaaaa...

(The dwarves watch her go.)

Pokey

What was that all about? 

Sparky

I don't know. She was weird.

Flaky

You suppose we oughta call the seven dwarves and warn 'em?

Schnooky

Good idea.

(They exit to the phone.)