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Al
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Welcome
back to the Al Roker program... We are here with the stars of Muppet
Treasure Island.
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Piggy
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Oh,
you're too kind.
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Al
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Yes.
And I don't know which I should do... Should I introduce you, Miss Piggy,
first?
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Kermit
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Oh,
sure.
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Al
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Kermit,
who gets top billing?
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| Kermit
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Ladies first. Ladies first.
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| Al
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Then, ladies and gentlemen...
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| Kermit
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Well, I get top billing, but
ladies first.
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| Piggy
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Me. ME. ME.
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| Al
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Miss Piggy...
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| Piggy
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Yes.
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| Al
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... and Kermit.
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| Piggy
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Don't you have some adjectives
in front of Miss Piggy?
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| Al
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The incredible, the
fabulous...
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| Piggy
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Keep goin'.
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| Al
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... the incomparable...
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| Piggy
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I'll take it; I'll take it.
Thank you, Al.
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| Al
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... the amazing...
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| Piggy
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Thank you, dear!
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| Al
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The... porcine...
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| Piggy
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All right! That'll do! Cut it!
CHILL!
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| Al
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All right. That's it. And of
course... Kermit the Frog.
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| Piggy
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Oh, yeah. Him.
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| Kermit
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I'm happy with that. Don't
need the adjectives. Thank you.
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| Al
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Now, you guys have worked
together in so many movies...
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| Piggy
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Wait, Al, didn't you get
married recently?
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| Al
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Yes, I did.
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| Piggy
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How long have you been
married?
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| Al
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I've been married for five
months now.
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| Piggy
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And are you happy?
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| Al
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I am very, very happy.
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| Piggy
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[to Kermit] He is very
HAPPY being married.
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| Kermit
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Uh huh. Ahem.
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| Piggy
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That's all. I just wanted to
say that.
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| Kermit
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Next!
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| Al
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I detect a little tension,
uh...
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| Piggy
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There's no tension, Al.
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| Kermit
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No, there's no tension, Al.
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| Piggy
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I just wanted him to know that
there are HAPPY marriages. Yes, Al?
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| Al
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Yes. Commitment.
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| Piggy
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COMMITMENT!
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| Kermit
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I know that. I KNOW that!
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| Piggy
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Frogs don't understand
commitment.
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| Al
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They don't! Really.
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| Kermit
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I do. I understand
that.
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| Piggy
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You understand, Al.
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| Al
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Well, I do, but I would
think somebody as --
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| Piggy
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Because you got MARRIED.
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| Al
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Well, yes, I did.
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| Piggy
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Fine.
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| Al
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Yes, yes. I did. But, y'know,
sitting on a lily pad, I would think, takes commitment too. Doesn't it,
Kermit?
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| Kermit
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Sure. Sure. Oh, listen. It
takes --
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| Piggy
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What is this, mano a mano
against el piggo, here?
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| Al
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It's a guy thing.
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| Kermit
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It's a guy thing!
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| Al
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It's a guy bonding...
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| Kermit
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Sitting out on the lily
pad.
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| Piggy
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Fine! Fine. I'll go find a pig
thing to talk about.
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| Kermit
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Yeah! Like the sty!
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| Al
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Uh oh...
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| Kermit
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Or eating SLOP!
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| Piggy
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I just, I -- Are you going to
hurt me, in front of Al?
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| Kermit
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Oh, am I going to hurt you
in front of Al?
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| Piggy
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Well, you're saying sty,
and slop, and all those things...
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| Kermit
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What, that hurt?
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| Al
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Guys, guys, guys...
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| Kermit
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I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
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| Piggy
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Butt OUT, Al!
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| Al
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Okay... I'll just... You guys
work this out.
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| Piggy
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Oh, sorry. Go ahead.
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| Kermit
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No, no. Go ahead.
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| Al
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Well, I just was wondering,
with this kind of... closeness... did you have any problems
together while you were doing Muppet Treasure Island? I mean,
any...
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| Kermit
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Well... We, uh, did one scene
together that was a little, uh, that took a little bit of, uh, work...
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| Piggy
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What?
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| Kermit
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You know, our one, we had kind
of an argument scene...
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| Piggy
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What?
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| Kermit
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In the movie. You remember
that scene?
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| Piggy
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No.
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| Kermit
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You know, we're sitting by the
water... and, uh, you know, the whole scene about where I supposedly -- supposedly!
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| Al
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Supposedly...
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| Kermit
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Left her at the altar, and all
that stuff... Remember that scene?
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| Piggy
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No.
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| Kermit
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You don't remember that
scene?
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| Piggy
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Mm-mmm.
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| Al
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Do you guys... Are you like
this all the time?
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| Piggy
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Ohhh! THAT scene!
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| Kermit
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Yes, you know.
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| Piggy
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All that I remember is... See,
when moi acts, moi is enveloped in the mood, and I just don't see anything
else, that's all.
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| Al
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You really enjoy that word,
"moi." Don't you, Miss Piggy?
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| Piggy
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Well, it's French.
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| Al
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Yes! Yes. The language of
love.
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| Piggy
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It has flair, and love.
Yes, exactly, Al. You know, because you're married.
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| Al
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Yes. Yes, I am.
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| Kermit
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Sheesh!
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| Piggy
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You know about love and
commitment, cause you're married.
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| Al
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I am. I am, Miss Piggy.
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| Piggy
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And you must love her. Very
Much. Don't you, Al?
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| Al
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Yes! Yes, I do. Yes.
Yes.
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| Piggy
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I suppose you're both going to
see Treasure Island together.
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| Kermit
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Piggy! Will you stop this! We
need to get on with the interview, okay?
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| Al
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That's right. In fact, I'm
going to be taking my daughter, who is nine years old, Courtney...
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| Piggy
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Ahhh!
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| Kermit
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Oh, yeah?
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| Al
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Yes, she's looking forward to
it.
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| Piggy
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Oh, you have children!
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| Al
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Well, I... I have a child...
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| Kermit
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Al... You're making this very
tough on me.
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| Al
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I'm sorry, Kermit.
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| Kermit
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I know you don't mean to be,
Al, but um...
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| Piggy
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I'm sorry. Just go ahead.
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| Al
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Well, you guys have had a
torrid affair, a love that has gone through the ages...
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| Kermit
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What?
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| Al
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When are you gonna finally get
married?
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| Kermit
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Well, uh -- I -- uh -- Al, I
have to say that, you know, way back in the old days, there might have
been a little spark between us, but these days, our relationship is just
extremely professional.
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| Al
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Oh, really.
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| Kermit
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Yes. That's all there is.
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| Al
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So, it's not a romantic thing
anymore?
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| Kermit
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Well, no. Only on the screen.
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| Piggy
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Al? Al.
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| Al
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Yes.
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| Piggy
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We're adults.
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| Al
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Mm-hmm.
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| Piggy
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Kermie has his life...
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| Kermit
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Yes.
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| Piggy
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Moi have my life. We have our
own separate lives.
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| Kermit
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Yup.
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| Piggy
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It's at night... that
we go gangbusters.
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| Kermit
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Wait a minute!
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| Al
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Oh, well! Now, is it true,
I've heard about you and Costner... I've heard your name linked with
Stallone...
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| Piggy
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Mmm-hmm.
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| Kermit
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Stallone?
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| Piggy
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My publicist has been workin'
overtime!
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| Al
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Banderas...
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| Kermit
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You've been with Antonio
Banderas? Gee...
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| Piggy
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I have not BEEN with Tony...
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| Kermit
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No, but you've been... been seen
with...
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| Piggy
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Tony and I talk.
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| Kermit
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Tony?
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| Piggy
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Long distance. We talk.
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| Kermit
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Sheesh.
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