Rizzo

[ on tape ] This is... [ A CNN logo flies past. ] Uh... That was CNN!

Kermit

Okay, welcome back, everybody. Now, don't adjust your TV sets. Larry King did not turn green. I'm Kermit the Frog, and I'm filling in for Larry while he's on vacation. [ Hulk Hogan and Carol Alt try to speak. ] I have to introduce you first. Just a second. My next two guests got their start in two very different worlds, the world of high-fashion modeling and the world of professional wrestling. Gee, come to think about it, maybe those two worlds aren't so different after all. Anyway, these two superstars are now both conquering the world of television in their new syndicated adventure show, Thunder In Paradise. Here are Carol Alt and Terry Hulk Hogan. Welcome, guys. [ They applaud. ] Oh, thank you. I appreciate the applause. 

Carol

That was very good.

Hulk

Very good.

Kermit

I'm kind of new to all of this.

Hulk

Ribbit.

Kermit

Yeah. You know, my first question for you guys is, which one of you is the high-fashion model and which one is the wrestler?

Carol

He is.

Hulk

I am. I've been making a fashion statement for quite some time, with those yellow tights, yellow boots, and sweaty, old bald head. By the way, Chris Lemmon, my partner...

Carol

Yes, Chris!

Hulk

... Nicholas, Brooke, my wife Linda. Hi.

Kermit

Yes, well, you know, isn't it great to be on here and be able to say hello to everybody?

Hulk

Mom! Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad.

Carol

Even when you didn't want us to.

Kermit

Well, listen, one thing I need to clear up before we go too much further. Should I call you Terry, or Hulk, or maybe Elmer, or Maurice, or...

Hulk

Well, you're my friend. You can call me Hulkster.

Kermit

Hulkster. Oh, great.

Hulk

Hulkster, dude.

Kermit

Hulkster, dude.

Hulk

That's right.

Kermit

How did I do? I'm not too good at that.

Carol

And don't make mistakes or he'll body-slam you one.

Kermit

Ooh, that doesn't sound like a lot of fun.

Carol

Trust me. I've made a couple mistakes.

Kermit

Uh oh. Oh, dear. Well, listen, now, I want to talk about your new show, Thunder in Paradise.

Carol

So do we.

Kermit

Yeah, well, of course. That's why you're here. Now, I know that originally it was a movie, and now it's a TV show. Maybe you should tell everybody a little bit about it.

Carol

Did it start that way? What happened here? I thought it was originally a TV show, and...

Kermit

Oh, maybe I'm wrong. Well, I know there was a movie.

Hulk

Go ahead, start.

Carol

You start.

Hulk

I'll start.

Carol

He'll start.

Hulk

[ starting ] This is a brand new action-adventure family show. Prime-time, syndicated, all across the country. It's about two ex-Navy seals. I'm one of them, and my very good friend and partner, Chris Lemmon, who is sitting at home, getting ready to have a baby -- I mean, his wife is -- he's the other Navy seal. And we have a high-tech boat, like a Batmobile of the water, called The Thunder.

Kermit

Wow.

Hulk

And I own a little beach bar. And the lovely, voluptuous, always charming, Mrs. Carol Alt, works for me, the way it should be.

Carol

Oh, wait a minute. Don't start.

Kermit

Carol may have different feelings about that.

Carol

Yeah, don't start.

Hulk

And I've got a little daughter named Ashley Gorrell. Mr. Patrick MacNee is also in the show.

Kermit

Oh, I remember Patrick MacNee from... lots of stuff.

Carol

Yup.

Hulk

That's right.

Kermit

Sure.

Hulk

I'm one of the producers of the show. And I'm partners with the guys that do Baywatch. So, we do have a white, sandy beach, with all the beautiful bodies, men and women, on there. And it's the greatest thing on TV, next to you, Kermit.

Kermit

You know, I think that's great. I love the fact that you're working around the water and stuff. We need to take a telephone call. We have a telephone call from Hollywood, California. Go ahead, Hollywood.

Piggy

[ on the phone again ] Hel-lo?

Kermit

Sheesh.

Hulk

Hello, hello. Sounds like she's my type.

Carol

I recognize that voice.

Piggy

I'm not going to take much time. I just want to say one thing to dear, sweet Carol. And Carol, this is from the heart, okay? 

Carol

Okay.

Piggy

Seriously. With all my love. Keep your cotton-pickin' hands off my frog.

Kermit

Piggy, please.

Carol

Is that a threat?

Piggy

Just take it as you will.

Carol

Oh, okay.

Kermit

Listen...

Piggy

Kermie --

Kermit

Wait, wait, wait, Piggy, Piggy, Carol is a happily married woman.

Piggy

Sure, tell me another story. 

Kermit

No, it's true...

Piggy

Kermit, there's a fan of Hulk Hogan's here, who would like to say... I'm going to go now, and...

Carol

But, I promise, Miss Piggy, my hands are on the table.

Piggy

Good. I'll keep the TV on.

Kermit

Okay.

Animal

[ on the phone ] HULK HOGAN! HULK HOGAN!

Hulk

Who's this, dude?

Kermit

It's Animal!

Animal

An-i-mal!

Kermit

Remember the drummer in the Dr. Teeth band?

Hulk

Animal?

Carol

Animal!

Kermit

Animal, what are you doing there with Miss Piggy?

Animal

Hulk Hogan! Hulk Hogan! Hulk Hogan!

Kermit

Animal, calm down, Animal.

Animal

Bye bye.

Hulk

Animal, you sound like Miss Piggy's agent. You know something, Kermit, I think to make Thunder in Paradise the number one show in the world, we need to get Miss Piggy out on the beach over there at Disney World --

Carol

In a bikini.

Hulk

In a red and yellow-polka-dot bikini. I like those colors myself.

Kermit

Well, I appreciate that. I'm sure Miss Piggy would appreciate it. But I've got to tell you, it's a very scary thought.

Carol

Oh, I'm not touching that one.

Hulk

I think it would make the show.

Kermit

You think it would make the show?

Hulk

I do.

Kermit

I think it would make the show something. I'm not sure what. You've got to be very careful with pigs in the sun, you know.

Carol

Why?

Kermit

You could end up with breakfast. It happens.

Carol

I walked right into that.

Gonzo

[ enters ] This is going great. This is fantastic.

Hulk

Yo, Gonzo.

Gonzo

This is so cool.

Hulk

You've been directing the show.

Kermit

Gonzo... 

Gonzo

Wait, I can't leave.

Kermit

What's the matter?

Gonzo

I don't know. I'm stuck.

Kermit

Excuse us. What is that?

Gonzo

There's gum under here.

Carol

Kermit, are you sticking your gum under there?

Kermit

No, it's Larry King. He's got...

Gonzo

Larry King puts his gum under here.

Hulk

Oh, no.

Gonzo

And there must be --

Kermit

He's got -- oh, there's about 50 pieces.

Carol

What's on this side?

Gonzo

50, 60 pieces under there.

Kermit

Watch your step, guys.

Gonzo

Yuck.

Kermit

Hey, listen, everybody. We have to go to a break. But we're going to come back and do more talking with our two special guests here. And a lot more show. So we'll be back very shortly.

Gonzo

Oh, it's going to be so cool.

Kermit

Yeah. This is great fun, huh?