|
| | Tough
Pigs Anthology
Christmas
2004
Secret
Santa
Part
5: Christmas
In Custody

|
Sullivan |
"The
day of Christmas Eve wore on, and evening came... But things were not going
well for Santa Claus, or his little elves."
|
The elves are worried -- it's already 10pm. In two hours, Santa is supposed to
take off on his sleigh and deliver the presents, but he's stuck in a dungeon,
and so are they.
|
Fred |
Hey,
I know what we should do!
|
|
Elves
|
You
do? Hey, what? What should we do?
|
|
Fred
|
Well,
we should escape from this dungeon, and rescue Santa Claus, and save
Christmas!
|
The elves groan. They need a real plan...

Meanwhile, in his cell, Santa shows Thig and Thog his disappearing coin
trick.
|
Thig |
Ho!
You showed us that ten or twelve times!
|
|
Thog |
And
it hasn't worked yet.
|
|
Santa
|
Why
don't you tell me what you'd like for Christmas?
|
|
Thog
|
Gosh!
Can I have anything?
|
|
Santa |
Almost
anything.
|
|
Thig |
Hey,
can I have a new club? Mine's kinda wore out.
|
|
Santa |
No,
no. You don't ask for presents like that. You ask for something nice, like
bicycles, or trucks.
|
|
Thog |
Ooh,
will you really give me a toy truck?
|
|
Santa
|
A
toy truck?
|
|
Thog
|
Yeah.
|
|
Santa |
I
certainly would...
|

Santa waves his hand -- and with a twinkle, he has a toy truck for Thog.
|
Thog |
Wow-ee!
Aaaah!
|
|
Santa |
All
right, what would you like?
|
|
|
(Thig
whispers.)
|
|
Thig |
Well...
I'd like a little teddy bear that's soft and cuddly...
|
|
Santa
|
I think I could whip that up.
|
|
Thig |
Yeah?
|
|
Santa |
Sure...
|

Santa pulls a teddy bear out of the air for Thig.
|
Thig |
Hey,
hey! Wait a minute! Where'd you get these things?
|
|
Santa
|
By
magic!
|
|
Thog
|
Magic?
|
|
Thig |
You're
not magic. You can't even do that disappearing coin trick!
|
|
Santa |
No,
no, no. I'm really not a magician. But Christmas is magic! Tonight is
Christmas Eve... and already, magic is beginning to work.
|

Santa waves his hand, and the cell transforms. A wreath appears on the cave
wall. A hole becomes a fiery hearth. There's toys and candles everywhere. It's
beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

|
Santa |
When
there's holly in the halls,
And
the wreath's upon the wall,
When
the night is filled with fallen snow...
And
the candles are set forth
And
the star shines in the north,
Upon
a quiet world below...
Then
you know it's Christmas time,
By
the laughter everywhere...
Then
you know it's Christmas time,
By
the magic in the air.
When
a tree is brought inside,
With
its branches spreading wide,
Fresh
from summer sun, and winter snow...
When
it shimmers silver bright
With
tiny stars of light,
When
it's hung with bells and balls and bows...
Then
you know it's Christmas time,
By
the laughter everywhere...
Then
you know it's Christmas time,
By
the magic in the air.
|
|
Santa |
So
now I think you understand.
|
|
Thig
|
I'll
say.
|
|
Thog
|
Hey,
Santa... Why are you always giving stuff to people?
|
|
Santa |
Well,
it's hard to explain, but... giving makes a person feel very, very
good.
|
|
Thig |
Hey,
Thog... you want my teddy bear?
|
|
Thog |
Okay.
You want my truck?
|
|
Thig
|
Oh,
sure...
|
|
Santa
|
Then
you know it's Christmas time,
By
the laughter everywhere...
Then
you know it's Christmas time,
By
the magic in the air.
|
|
Thig |
Santa...
we'll let you out of the dungeon now.
|
|
Santa |
That
would be nice, boys.
|

|
Cosmo |
Hi
there, Mr Claus!
|
|
Santa |
Oh!
Hello, Mr Scam.
|
|
Cosmo |
I
see you've talked Thig and Thog into deserting us.
|
|
Thig
|
We're
gonna help Santa deliver the presents!
|
|
Thog |
He's
just got to, cause Christmas is magic.
|
|
Cosmo |
I
see. Well, let me show you some magic of my own. Ga-probble KRUMP!
|

With a wave of his hand, Cosmo dissolves all the Christmas paraphernalia.
Now they're stuck in a bare cell again.
|
Cosmo |
Now,
Santa, old boy, here's a Christmas present. This lock is for you, Santa!
And it can only be opened with this key. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna
BURGLARIZE THE WORLD!
|
|
Thog
|
But...
|
|
Cosmo
|
Oh!
Merry Christmas. Ho! Ho! Ho!
|
|
Santa |
Uhhh...
Merry Christmas, Mr Scam.
|

Meanwhile, Fred has cooked up a real plan. The elves have made themselves
costumes, and are now disguised as rocks. To attract the guard's
attention, they scream, "The elves have escaped! The elves have
escaped!"

The guard is horrified: The elves have
escaped! He rushes off to search for them...

... and the elves quietly tiptoe out.


The guard walks by, without spotting the elves sneaking through the
caverns.
|
Fred |
Isn't
that great? That Frackle took us for granite!
|
Fred sings, as the elves do a little softshoe.
|
Fred |
The
clock goes tock,
The
time has flown,
A
flock of rocks
Must
act alone.
Our
plan is grand,
Our
goal must be
To
find St Nick
And
set him free.
|
The elves slip away, in search of Santa...
Next:
Frackle Rocks
Santa
Switch contents
Danny@ToughPigs.com
Anthology
contents
|