Tough Pigs News Extra
August 12, 2002
TV Guide Grills the Frog
From TVGuide.com -- August 12, 2002
by Charlie Mason
Reprinted entirely without permission
In a showbiz career that spans a quarter of a century and includes television (The Muppet Show), film (The Muppet Movie) and theater (Muppets On Ice), Kermit the Frog has never given a performance that was less than, uh, ribbeting. Now, at last, the consummate professional is being given his due: Come fall, the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce will award him a star on the Walk of Fame, and almost as exciting, today TV Guide Online is asking him seven questions that are so silly, they just might get us hired as a gag writer for his pal Fozzie Bear.
TV Guide Online: Congratulations on your star. But tell the truth -- aren't you relieved that receiving the honor won't involve making webbed handprints in cement?
Kermit the Frog: I'm thrilled about being the first amphibian to be honored on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Frogs aren't usually that comfortable being so close to a busy road, but in this case, I'll make an exception. As for putting my webbed handprints in cement, I wouldn't mind that... as long as they don't use quicksand.
TVGO: The Starz biopic Kermit's Swamp Years (premiering Sunday) tells your life story. What parts of your past were you a, ahem, tad nervous about revealing?
Kermit: This is my true story -- warts and all. There aren't any outrageous scandals to reveal. I guess that's why E!'s True Hollywood Story and VH1's Behind the Music decided not to air it. But you will see how I rose out of the muck, survived on a diet of insects and grubs, then dropped tail and headed out into the great big world outside the swamp.
TVGO: Working on your NBC holiday special must be making you pretty nostalgic, too. What was the best gift you ever received back when you were a wee pollywog?
Kermit: We're having a lot of fun making A Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie. Every day is like Christmas, which basically means that every day Miss Piggy insists on getting presents. It should be great -- if we don't run out of presents. As for the best gift I ever got, that's easy; my first fly swatter. It's every young frog's favorite toy.
TVGO: In the music video for Weezer's Keep Fishin', Miss Piggy seems quite taken with drummer Pat Wilson. Heck, she even kidnaps the guy. Did that make you see green?
Kermit: See green? Oh, I get it. Funny. Are you the one who keeps sending Fozzie jokes?
TVGO: Flatterer. Seriously, didn't Piggy's infatuation with Pat make you the least bit jealous?
Kermit: No, I wasn't jealous of Pat. Sympathetic, sure. Been there, done that. Absolutely. But definitely not jealous!
TVGO: You and your fellow Muppets recently agreed to do a new series on Fox. Do you have a strategy in mind to keep the network from calling the show When Animal Attacks?
Kermit: When Animal Attacks... another zinger for you. Are you positive you haven't been selling Fozzie material for his act?
TVGO: I should be so lucky. But about the new show...
Kermit: We're excited about it, but we don't yet have a name for it. I'm kind of partial to Ally McSqueal, but we'll have to see.
TVGO: Technical question here -- if you're color-blind, can you still find the rainbow connection?
Kermit: Of course -- just follow me. If you end up at a pot of gold, that just means you followed the wrong little green man.
TVGO: Finally, let's get a little personal. Have you ever been in a fancy restaurant and had to say, "Excuse me, waiter, but there isn't a fly in my soup?"
Kermit: That settles it -- your stuff is perfect for Fozzie.
TVGO: Surely you jest... right?
Kermit: I'll call Fozzie's joke writer Gags Beasley to see if he needs some new material.