Part 1 – Part 2 – Part 3 – Part 4
Our Threadless contest coverage continues with another giant batch of Muppet fan art and lots of words about each one. Exciting stuff, right?? Right? Oh I hope so. (Please like me.)
Beaker says one thing. And that one thing is pretty easy to spell. So when you get it wrong, it’s pretty obvious. And when you completely cover a character with that misspelling, it’s borderline embarrassing.
My rating: 2
Fozzie’s flocked with Wockas! What a shock! Don’t knock it as a crock until it’s locked onto a sock you can hock for a glock… made out of chalk… Sorry, I’m done.
My rating: 4
Yes, let’s get more character faces onto t-shirts! I would go nuts for a Sam the Eagle one, or to buy a set of Manha Manha and Snowths for me and whoever happens to be standing on either side of me! I’m not sure why Animal seems to be on there twice, or why Kermit’s collar is dangling above his head, but my vote goes for the other three, as well as all the other obscure characters in my head. Lew Zealand! Mildred! Gaffer!
My rating: 4
Since Disney seems to be all about cramming all the Muppets into a tiny area for any given poster or art project they have these days, I wouldn’t be surprised if they try this exact thing at some point. But whatever the artist did to fade the colors doesn’t look so hot to me. They all look blurry and muted, and way less exciting than they normally are. And seriously, Mr. Poodlepants is in there? Come on you guys. Just come on.
My rating: 3
What??? There’s a slim possibility that we’d get a t-shirt featuring Behemoth?? What do I need to do to make this a reality? Someone get the President on the phone!
My rating: 5
Kermit looks so great when he’s channeling his froggy cousin Michigan J. Plus, this origami look fits him really well. I’d love to see all of the Muppets in this style, and then make them dance for me. DANCE!!!
My rating: 5
Ah yes, the classic Kermit faces. Happy Kermit, angry Kermit, nerdy Kermit, mustachioed Kermit, crying tears directly into his mouth Kermit.
My rating: 3
I wish I remembered anything from my music appreciation days. Is this the actual sheet music for the Muppet Show theme? If so, brilliant. If not, missed opportunity. Assuming the notes are all correct, this piece works on so many levels, and musicians everywhere would fight over who gets to wear this shirt. The compromise is that everyone would get to wear it and it would become our country’s national uniform.
My rating: 5
Kermit Having Fun“Time’s fun when you’re having flies” is one of those Kermit idioms that I can’t help but marvel at the cleverness. Usually, I roll my eyes at a good chunk of his frog jokes, as they make the puns way too easy. But does it work on a t-shirt? Maybe, but not as well as in a book of Kermit quotes (which, by the way, it’s in every single one of them).
My rating: 3
Mistaken IdentityIf you’re going to repurpose the photo from Kermit’s US stamp, it’s a good idea to change the meaning with him bursting out of his wanted poster, if only to tie it in to the new movie. But then I remembered that nobody would poke their head through a wanted poster, and now it seems lame all over again. And yet, I’d take it all back for a shot at that sweet, sweet reward.
My rating: 2
Muppets Russian DollsWhy aren’t Muppet nesting dolls real yet? They have Muppets in Russia! They should be working on this already! Do I have to do everything around here?
My rating: 3
Hitchhiking KermitYesterday we saw a bad ass picture of Kermit walking with his banjo and suitcase in hand, and although this piece is a similar style and theme, it’s not the same artist. And it’s not quite as good. Kermit seems less active and in a less interesting environment. It’s still pretty in its own right, but Kermit needs to stop being depicted like he’s waiting for help and he needs to start being represented as a Frog who takes action.
My rating: 3
Professor HoneydewLo, Bunsen, like the waking sun, rises in the east to greet the day. In the eve, Bunsen’s head dips down below the horizon to slumber until the next morn.
My rating: 3
Kermit from the Other Dimension
Oh don’t worry, Kermit’s just tearing a hole in your chest cavity so he can check up on you. Do you need a glass of water? Some gum? Some sutures?
My rating: 3
Patriot SamI think a patriotic Sam the Eagle shirt would be an easy sell, especially around the Fourth of July. This one almost gets there, but not quite. The stars in the background are meaningless (maybe if they were fireworks, or if they were colored red white and blue). Sam doesn’t salute for no reason (although his reasons may not always be good ones). Hopefully since he has a larger role in the new movie, we’ll see some cool Sam merch coming down the line.
My rating: 3
Muppet SplatterThe splatter design has a bit of a ’90s feel to it, which is either dated or retro depending on how you look at it. But beyond that, there’s a big risk of having it look sloppy (the bad kind) rather than sloppy (the good kind). This piece thankfully falls in the latter category, with some nice representations of Kermit, Animal and Scooter in particular. Gonzo doesn’t come across as well when he’s not in profile, and Fozzie looks a little small (and odd without his hat), but it still works. Even though it’s, you know, sloppy.
My rating: 4
Animal FoodThe first time I went to Los Angeles, I made a point to visit In ‘n’ Out Burger. I did my research beforehand to learn all the variations of the burgers so I could make one to fit my palate. One option is called “Animal Style”, which involves a mustard-grilled burger, extra veggies, and a special sauce. I don’t know if that’s what the artist here was envisioning, but I definitely thought of Animal while eating my delicious hamburger, and now my mouth is watering and I want to go back for more. Damn this t-shirt.
My rating: 5
Kermit Can Do It Too!I make no secrets of my love and respect for Jean Claude Van Damme. Yes, he makes terrible movies, but he is awesome and he can kick you in the side of your head before you realize his foot is off the ground. And like the rest of the internet, I went nuts at his Volvo commercial where he does the splits over a pair of moving trucks. I’m not surprised that Kermit is capable of the same feat, but I really love seeing him pay homage to the great JCVD.
My rating: 5
This is Kermit“This is Kermit.” Do you think that’s what they said when a Henson Company house artist drew this picture 20 years ago? I guess it still holds true.
My rating: 1
Frog InvaderI’m behind the idea of a Kermit pattern shirt like this, but is his full-bodied silhouette that recognizable once its shrunk down so small? It might be more effective with Kermit’s head, or even his eye. This is just a pattern of tiny green men marching in formation.
My rating: 2
Super Gonzo!Waitasec. Since Gonzo’s been depicted in his cape and tights uniform in so much merchandise, do people think he’s a superhero? He’s a daredevil! He doesn’t have superpowers. He can’t fly. At least, not without a cannon or a bunch of balloons.
My rating: 2
The EntertainersYikes, that gray color is creepy. It looks like all of Kermit’s friends died and now their ghosts are haunting him.
My rating: 3
PortraitsI can’t look past Statler, who is staring at me as if we’re on a desert island and he thinks I’m a giant pork chop.
My rating: 3
ZootThat’s a really nice portrait of Zoot. He especially looks good against the black background, as if he’s made of velvet (actually… is he??). The world needs more Zoot shirts.
My rating: 5
Lew Zealand: Tough GuyToughPigs’ artist in residence Chris “Smig” Smigliano has a few horses in this race, and the first of which features a shifty-looking Lew Zealand. Smig draws a great Lew, and it would look awesome on a shirt. Even beyond all that, Smig draws fantastic Muppet art every single day… Threadless should take notice and print one of his designs already!
My rating:Withheld, since the artist is one of us.
KermitWow, Kermit got some mad air. Either that, or he crashed into a window and now he’s lying on his back on the pavement, surrounded by tiny star-shaped shards of glass. The moral of the story here is: Skateboards are radical!
My rating: 4
Kermit Talking with KermitWhat exactly is Kermit doing here? He’s talking to his hand? That’s not how puppets work. Not even in a meta sort of way. Is he just that lonely? Now I’m sad for him.
My rating: 3
Busted FrogWhat do you think, is Kermit upset because he’s been arrested or because he just found out that he’s only a little over a foot tall?
My rating: 3
BorkThere’s something decidedly dirty about the Swedish Chef’s placement, which I won’t mention because I’m a gentleman. But I hinted at it, which means I’m at least partly a filthy animal.
My rating: 3
Wakka Wakka WakkaThis doesn’t look as much like a sketch of Fozzie Bear as it does a sketch of a Fozzie Bear stuffed animal. Which makes me want to cuddle up with a plush Fozzie because you just know he’s all soft and plump and just happy to get a little love.
My rating: 3
Muppets Kaboom!Are the Muppets running from a pancake batter explosion? Whose baseball cap is that? Is Miss Piggy giving an awkward curtsey? I have so many questions, none of which have a chance of being answered.
My rating: 4
Electric MayhemDr. Teeth and company are looking a little flat. It looks like a stylistic choice in Animal and Zoot, and like a mistake in Janice and Floyd. This piece needs something to make it pop, especially since there are so many other great Electric Mayhem illustrations in the contest.
My rating: 3
Golden Teeth and Golden TonesLike this one! The paper-cutout style looks great, and I really like the font and swirly design around the faces. It’s delightfully retro.
My rating: 5
Dr Teeth Tour T-shirtsHey, even more great Electric Mayhem designs! Some work better than others. Dr. Teeth and Animal look awesome, but Zoot and Janice look weird with their features separated like that. In any case, I’d be glad to see each of the band members get their own little spotlight in this way.
My rating: 5
SurstrommingAccording to the artist, “Surstromming” is a Swedish dish, which happens to be pretty smelly. So of course the Chef would be serving it. Unfortunately, it’s a reference only a handful of people would get, and even less would find all that amusing.
My rating: 2
RoyalsPiggy’s human hand is freaking me out. FREAKING ME. RIGHT. THE HELL. OUT.
My rating: 2
Free Kermit the FrogFree Kermit the Frog?? I’ll take three! One to play with, one to keep in mint condition, and one to sell on eBay for a profit.
My rating: 4
Green Before It was CoolAnother goopy, gloppy Kermit. He’s just dripping with delicious ooze! Yum!
My rating: 2
The WeirdoNice effort on Gonzo, but it’s in that weird fuzzy area between correctly-proportioned and stylized. It’s really neither, so he just looks a little off. Not that that’s an easy task. His nose alone is just about impossible to recreate.
My rating: 2
Lord of the Flies!I love it when two things I love collide and make baby things I love! Like Ninja Turtles and Muppets, which combine to make this awesome piece of awesomeness. I want him as an action figure pretty badly.
My rating: 5
Kermit Ruff-insWhat was the purpose of those Shakespearean neck ruffles? The best I can tell, they were made so frogs like Kermit could set their pointed collars out to dry.
My rating: 5
Meta-KermitOh man. Creepy. Just imagine the identity issues you’d go through if you were a puppet bringing a puppet version of yourself to life. But as potentially unsettling as that is, I would love to own a little puppet of me. I’ve been told I can do the voice pretty well.
My rating: 4
No EscapeHere’s Smig’s next entry, with a take on a classic prison joke. Seriously, this thing is hilarious. Come on, Threadless! Give a guy a break!!
My rating: Withheld, since the artist is one of us.
Kermit DottedIt’s not that easy being Photoshopped. Oh wait, yes it is. Like, super easy.
My rating: 1
BBBunsen’s head is cut off so high, it’s like there’s just a bright green lump oozing down the bottom of the shirt. No wonder Sideways Beaker looks so shocked.
My rating: 2
…And They’re Off!Animal looks good in Easy Rider mode. And I like Gonzo’s almost-bored look as he’s launched out of a cannon. It’s pretty appropriate for both of them. And yet, I have no idea who would win that race. Gonzo would probably crash land a foot short of the finish line, and Animal would deliberately crash his bike, then stop to eat it. In other words, we’re all winners.
My rating: 5
Muppet InvestigationKermit’s wanted for being humble? Dang. It’s a good thing I have a huge ego, or else I’d be headed up the river too.
My rating: 3
Miss PiggylisaPiggy looks less like a work of Da Vinci and more like a First Lady.
My rating: 3
KermitWHAT NO WHY DON’T NO NO STOP NO.
My rating: 2
Happy ShowingThis is a very nice Kermit. I like that he’s performing and not just smiling for no reason. He deserves that spotlight, both literally and figuratively.
My rating: 5
EvolutionWOW! It’s this Muppet Wiki page illustrated! From Jim Henson’s mother’s coat to the original Kermit, through the Ed Sullivan and Sesame Street and Muppet Show Kermits, right into Modern Kermit. The differences are really subtle, but blatantly obvious to people like us. This is easily one of the most specific and most interesting entries in the contest, and possibly my #1 pick so far.
My rating: 5
We’re halfway through! Head back here soon for part 3 of our Threadless Muppet t-shirt contest coverage and even more amazing and awful Muppet fan art!
Click here to watch the Frog evolve on the ToughPigs forum!
by Joe Hennes – Joe@ToughPigs.com
