ASTORIA, NEW YORK – After nearly four years since its initial announcement, anticipation has been building ahead of the opening of the permanent Jim Henson exhibit at the Museum of the Moving Image, and it’s done nothing but build since we still don’t know when the exhibit will open. Recently, this intrepid reporter trekked to Queens to go behind the curtain and see just what was going on back there. Unfortunately, security made it abundantly clear that actually going behind the curtain was, in fact, trespassing, and the museum would revoke my membership should I break any rules. As a proud ToughPigs correspondent, I would gladly give life and limb to get an important story, but like the coward I am, I draw the line at giving my museum membership. So making the best of my situation, I provided the best possible updates, without actually having any news of substance to report.
10:30 AM – The doors open promptly, and this reporter is there. The ticket agent, allegedly named “Sean,” and I strike a rapport. I ask for one ticket…for the truth. “Sean” feigned ignorance as to my request, but offered me admission into the museum in exchange for fifteen dollars, but as I whipped out my membership card, he backed out of the offer, saying, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know that you were a member,” and bribes me with a ticket free of charge. There are some shady characters working at this museum, but such is the danger of investigative Muppet reporting. Nothing from this point on will deter me from my search for the truth.
10:36 AM – Okay, first I headed to the restroom. It’s a long way to Astoria, especially if you downed an entire Big Gulp on the way there! But from this point on, absolutely nothing would deter me.
11:02 AM – The first construction workers begin to head behind the curtain leading to the future Henson exhibit. Small talk is barely audible from the public area. I can confirm that at least one worker is indeed excited for the New York Mets’ opening day this coming Monday, and believes Noah Syndergaard will have at least fifteen wins this year.
11:48 AM – A museum docent approaches me, obviously to chase me off from staring at the curtain. She asks me if I have any questions about the museum, claiming that she saw me watching the curtain and that she “didn’t know if I was lost or confused.” Having nothing to lose, I ask point-blank: “When is the Jim Henson exhibit opening?” But she’s wily. She answers, “I wish I knew. Hopefully soon. My kids would love to see it.” And that’s why I’m here. For her kids. For other people’s kids. For those kids’ parents. For people who aren’t parents. People in general, I guess.
12:24 PM – Noises indicate a large object is being loaded into the Henson gallery, and through the light coming from the construction site, I can make out that it is, in fact, a large sheet of plywood. For what purpose this plywood has been loaded in for can only be guessed about. A display case for Big Bird, Thog, or an unidentified Mutation? A display case for a smaller Muppet, like Fozzie Bear or the Mighty Favog? A display case for other artifacts, like Beauregard’s taxi? Or, unlikely though it may seem, not a display case? The mind boggles, particularly about display cases.
12:51 PM – I begin to look for clues about things to come for the exhibit elsewhere in the museum. Could their Chewbacca mask have indeed been used in The Muppet Show’s episode 417? Does the appearance of a Spider-Man cartoon imply that there will be a full-case retrospective on Muppet Babies and Muppet appearances on The Electric Company? Could that construction worker’s talk of the Mets mean that in the collection are Mookie Wilson and Keith Hernandez’s uniforms as seen in Sesame Street’s Season 19? Did I remember to eat something today? I’ve been told I get a little paranoid and loopy when I don’t eat, but I’m sure that’s not related to anything. I head back to the curtain, blowing right past a model of some lockers or something like that.
1:07 PM – With little to report on, I take advantage of the museum’s free wi-fi and check up on my social media. I know Joe and Ryan would hate to see me slacking off on a big report like this, but as long as I remove this entry before it gets published, I should be fine.
1:19 PM – My first big story! A worker in a green polo shirt is carrying a black vinyl bag into the construction site. This must mean that the first Muppets are arriving in the exhibit, and I’m here to report on it! Take that, Muppet Mindset! This baby is a ToughPigs exclusive!
1:23 PM – I have learned that the worker is, in fact, from the Subway across the street from the museum, and is delivering lunch. The only exclusive I have is that there were at least two orders of the Italian B.M.T. (I myself am a Turkey Breast and Ham man.) This is a bit of a let-down, however, I still hold out hope that they also generously donated a set of Muppets Most Wanted drawstring bags.
1:55 PM – With just five minutes until the museum closes for the day, I have practically nothing to report. There is a small clatter, and a screwdriver rolls out from under the curtain. A construction worker asks me if I could grab that for him, and I oblige. I pick up the screwdriver and approach the curtain, and for one fleeting moment, the curtain finally opens to me as I return the sacred screwdriver, off to help tell Jim Henson’s story for generations to come. After hours of waiting, I can finally see…a lot of plastic wrap covering things, a few paint cans, and some drywall. My time has paid off. I can now say without a doubt to Muppet fans around the world that the Jim Henson exhibit is indeed…under construction!
I exit the museum, satisfied with the knowledge that I personally can testify that the gallery is, in fact, coming soon. I learned a lot about the exhibit, and I think, learned a little about myself. Mostly that I should really grab breakfast before a day of staking out future exhibits. Satisfied with a day’s journalism done, I drift to sleep on the train ride home, completely missing my stop and having to call a taxi to take me back to the right station. Truly, life as a ToughPigs reporter is always exciting.
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by Matthew Soberman – Matthew@ToughPigs.com
