Part Six : Once and For All
Kermit and Miss Piggy
on Entertainment Tonight, June 1984
| [ Miss Piggy looks at a diamond ring.] | |
| Lee
|
In March, Miss Piggy had stars in her eyes at Tiffany’s… |
| Piggy
|
Oooh! |
| [ cut to: Kermit ] | |
| Kermit
|
No comment! |
| [ Piggy watches a fashion show on TV. ] | |
| Lee
|
In April, she shopped for a Halston trousseau… by television. |
| Piggy
|
That’s a nice dress. I could use that for my pre-nuptials. |
| [ cut to: Kermit ] | |
| Kermit
|
No comment! Aaah! |
| [ Piggy talks on the telephone. ] | |
| Lee
|
In May, she planned a honeymoon… through travel agent. |
| Piggy
|
Moi is looking for a vacationne… |
| Lee
|
All the while, Kermit refused to confirm that he’s the lucky frog. |
| [ cut to: Kermit, a microphone stuck in his face ] | |
| Kermit
|
Well, uh, no comment! |
| [ Piggy meets with a fashion designer. ] | |
| Lee
|
In June, she met with designer Ron Lavice. |
| Piggy
|
Moi am ready to peruse the wedding apparel. |
| [ Piggy looks over a model, wearing a wedding gown. ] | |
| Piggy
|
It is in a smaller size for moi, isn’t it? |
| Ron
|
Well, we would do a custom fitting for you, so it would fit perfectly… |
| Piggy
|
Yes. I have a daintier figure. Nothing personal, Diane. |
| [ Piggy looks at a wedding cake. ] | |
| Caterer
|
There is something we would be happy to do for you, and let me show it to you. |
| Piggy
|
What’s that? |
| [ The caterer shows Piggy a wedding cake topper with a frog and a pig. ] | |
| Caterer
|
This would just be for you on your wedding, from the Plaza. |
| Piggy
|
Ooooh! Now you are talking. |
| [ Cut to: Kermit and Piggy, interviewed together. ] | |
| Lee
|
When Entertainment Tonight last spoke with both stars, we learned about their wedding scene in the new movie The Muppets Take Manhattan. But Miss Piggy confused the issue by claiming it was a real wedding. So we asked them back to clear it up, once and for all. |
| Piggy
|
Kermie knows that we were married in The Muppets Take Manhattan. |
| Kermit
|
You’re still saying that! You’re not supposed to be talking like that. |
| Piggy
|
Why? |
| Kermit
|
How many times have I told you? It’s just a wedding in a movie. I’m — I’m tired of the news press just asking questions like that. And I wish you wouldn’t keep harping on this, Lee. |
| Piggy
|
The simple fact is… that Kermie and moi were married by a real minister in the movie, The Muppets Take Manhattan. |
| Kermit
|
PIGGY! How many times have I told you! Can you — can you just take your cameras out of here. I’m not talking anymore in this kind of thing. I’m sorry. I’m gonna have to just leave. [ Kermit exits. ] |
| Piggy
|
Lee? You should feel very proud. You — and the world — have just experienced our first marriage tiff. |
| Kermit
|
[ offscreen ] WHAT? |
| Piggy
|
I’ll be home soon, dear! He’s cooking. |
by Danny Horn
